As a filmmaker of the unique vision JayLind has brought to the screen a number of films of intensely erotic imagery and vivid scenes of sensual violence. Born in Salisbury, Md. A small town just outside Hooterville. Jay is thought by scholars to have been responsible for creating the English language in its present form. Subsequently he claims to have been raised by wolves. JayLind served as a counter intelligence agent in Europe, (1980-1984) and was decorated for meritorious service, valor, and wounds received in the line of duty.

Jay has been romantically linked to a number of actresses and models over the years. Married three times, the last time to the Scream Queen Maria Pechukas. Jay has two Children, Justin and Amanda. "Horror films are rituals of Pagan worship, there Western Man obsessively confronts what Christianity has never been able to bury or explain away." - Camille Paglia. An interview with Jay Lind Conducted by Kate Mellows

I found the ghoul relaxing on his back porch, in the shade, the sideaway from the sun. He was laying there on a chaise lounge in his pajamas,listening to another lovely Kate Bush song in a line of a thousand, he looked up at me as I stepped over the sleeping form of a very curvy, very naked, brunette fast asleep in the sleep of the damned. His eyes are very intense, you notice that right away, they seem full of genius and pain and loss- a kind of madness that artist have; that combined psychosis and paranoia that feeds the fire of their creativity, their genius, like rocket fuel.

The Ghoul, Jay Lind (Or a she jokingly-we think-insists) is thumbing through a well-worn edition of Sydney Pollock's book on making movies. There are piles of books everywhere; (The Original text w/ Stokers notes!) Various psychological studies on Vampirism and Hemaotomania, maybe twenty more learned tomes, including those by Dom Calmet and Montegue Summerson the supernatural vampire. Jay takes a sip of coffee in the way that an addict takes a sip of heroin, smiles and looks over to me. Coffee? I decline and he looks at me as if I passed on salvation.

Jay Lind- Pardon the mess,my attention span doesn't allow me to spend too much time with just one author right now, but I have to research my new movie. Kate- And it about Vampires.

Jay Lind- I suppose, but it really about us. About violence and sex and death.There may, in fact be no Supernatural vampires in this movie at all, which leaves us with a truly sad little girl, who's been terribly abused and betrayed, to whom vampirism is a religion that she can understand and grab hold of. Can I tempt you with some cappuccino.

Kate- Thank you, no. It keeps me up all night. Jay Lind- I thought that was the point? Kate-, Let's talk alittle about this new movie. Jay Lind -To Dance With Death. Sure, with out giving away the end, I live, if you can call this living, to promote.

Kate- Well, what was the genesis of the movie? Jay Lind- I was out walking, persecution Christians, and a voice came to me. I looked around and saw that the voice was coming from some sort of flaming shrubbery. My first thought was to pee on it, put out the fire, it was a real hazard,but then, as I got closer and couldn't pee, I realized that it was the Lord God speaking directly to me: He said Go-est thou into thy world and make thee a horror film. It shall be made of celluloid and will contain Brinke Stevens and Lauren Hemlock, as nude as often as you can get them that way, and it is good.

Kate- Just checking for lightning clouds. A joke, right? Jay Lind- Standard is she paying attention routine. How it really came about was I had my daughter Amanda for Christmas 99, and we had a blast. We watched Sleepy Hollow and laughed the whole way through twice. Went to the Mall, bought tons of gifts, ya know the whole middle class thing, as close as could be when you're father carries a letter from a State Hospital saying he is not nuts (Just in case the State Police ask, I've got the letter) Anyway, one evening, it was getting close to the timefor her to go home, I was sad, mostly because she is one of the true lights in this world and I miss her and her Brother Justin painfully when I'm not with them.

Anyway, short version, Amanda decides, as 12 year olds can, that the reason for my funk (Other than hit or miss personal hygiene) is that I'm depressed because I'm frustrated about not being able to shoot my pet project VALERIE (note: trumpets play a royal display), and that whatI should do is, look at the equipment I have, count the money in the bank that I can spend and write a script covering my social/theological and sexual kinks and issues and shoot that.

Or something like that. Her actual words were; Silly Daddy, why don't write a movie that you can shoot? She smiled, batted her eye lashes, the Heavens opened and I was at the steam powered-Hi-Tech ee-leck-tron-ik-computati-machine banging out the first draft before you could say Jack Robinson, which I can say pretty quickly.

Kate- How'd that go? Jay Lind- Smooth as Ice. Wealmost went careening over the guard rail of life so many times that Satan was sending me frequent flyer miles, which I still have in a jar somewhere.

Kate- How long did it take you to get a script? Jay Lind- A little more thana week, my best writing spurts out fast, escaping my brain before it can be rewritten to DEATH! We do work to craft and change things as we're shooting, as we see the characters become alive and interact. I love working with Actors the most of all, and good actors can bring such positive energy and such good ideas. I become a little vampire around them, sucking up all the good ideas and twisting them around into something completely new.

Kate- Was very difficult to make, compared to your other films. It seems to have come together rather rapidlly where as... Jay Lind- I guess this is as good a time as ever to bury this. I love Carmilla, I think it's a wonderfully erotic horror film with some very nuanced and powerful performances. It took however long it took because that's how long it takes to make that movie.

Kate- Four years? Jay Lind- We had tofire two producers because they were stealing from the company and making unprofessional statements to the female actors that could not be tolerated. We worked with some great guys in Long Island, Jon Sheppart and Keith Matturro (Depraved), but the length of the schedule forced them to move on to their own projects.Finally we had a Born Again Christian Producer start up the whole Will you date me? Can of worms and he had to go. On the day I went to tell him this I find that he's moved out of his house and gone off to some weird Christian/Nazi retreat and never returned.

On top of that I was dealing with an actress, a wonderful actress, who was very self-destructive, suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder. So, we had to shut down for a week or two, or a month, waiting for the stitches to come out, or the actress to be released from the hospital. Even if you don't take any of that back story into account is a kickass vampire movie, and Maria's performance is Oscar caliber.

-At this point the Naked Girl stirs and offers us even more coffee, returning with a pot for Jay, still no clothes or a robe though- Jay Lind- I'm sorry. I doget defensive sometimes, nothing personal. Kate- I understand. Now, do you feel up to talking about To Dance with Death?

Jay Lind- Sure. Honestly, it is the best movie I have ever made. Brinke Stevens, who is a wonderful actress gives a very difficult, well conceived, subtle performance in a role that could have easily been a stereotype.Brinke plays the Angel of Death, and we're not really sure what her motives are, so she's a sinister prescience through out the film. She and the main character Jennifer have these conversations, very Zen, about good and evil, life and death, God and Satan. Really momentous things. The girl who plays Jennifer, Amy Lauren Hemlock was a gem.

I had done a theatre production of "Social Security" with her. I directed and played David, she played my wife, Barbara, and there was such a chemistry that I knew she had to play Jennifer. And I knew that I had to use her, and Victoria (The girl who plays Becca) and Brinke many times again. They make me a better Artist.

Kate- In what way? Jay Lind- well, say I'm a painter, but I have to hold back on my emotional investment in each work because the brushes I have are'nt the right ones, and the paints are dull and theres no red, or worse the red is almost exactly not right? With a filmmaker, the most important tools are the actors, and when you get some good ones, you'd be a fool not to hold on to them, use them as often as you can.

Kate- So this is the beginning of the road, so to speak, with you and the cast of To Dance with Death? Jay Lind- I hope so. It was better than a dream working with Brinke, she instinctively knew what I was telling her to do, and did it with no reservations. And she's got great chops, a range of emotion to kill for and the ability to inhabit the characters skin with out that driving her nuts. (Which is always a real possibility in these kinds of roles) .

I love Brinke in so many ways as an artist, a person, her beliefs and her commitment to the work are all things to be proud of and to respect. Working with Amy Lauren was just as great, in a different way; I'd known Brinke for close to a decade and we'd been trying to get a movie together for half that time at least.

Amy and I, on the other hand, had known each other a matter of months (Maybe a year) and she had to trust me as I tossed her into this nightmare Naked world with Suicide and Death and Angels and Lesbians and realities that are just as real and unreal as anything the mind of a demented poet can dream up. So, she blew me away. I knew she was good, but nobody's that good. Are they? She is. Beautiful, smart and talented is a very heady combination. Is it any reason I fell hard for my lead actresses?

Kate- What do you mean? I've heard that you have a lot of affairs onset. Jay Lind- That's totally unfair.I met two of three ex-wives working on films. I work in the movies, where else am I going to meet girls? I never hit on anyone while I'm working with them, that would be completely unprofessional and sleazy. No, what I meant, which may sound stranger still, is that I fall in love with my lead actresses and use that love, passion, to instruct and fill the movie with beautiful images, sensual images supporting them, and they are the most beautiful, the most sensual of all.

Kate- How is "Death" different than say, I don't know, Iron Bound Vampire? Jay Lind- I don't know, I've never seen it. I don't watch too much horror, so I don't run the risk of my work being infected by someone else's ideas. Kate- "Blair Witch Project"? Jay Lind- Good Idea, but badly told. My Movie's in focus all the time and you can understand what the actors are saying. There's also a point to my story.

Kate- Educate me. Jay Lind- later - Oh, the movie, well. Horror doesn't just exist in the comic book. It is everywhere, all around us, changing us and our perceptions of what is real and what is not, what is good and what is evil. Primal Nightmares are rooted in reality, and the overlapping of image scan be disorienting and terrifying. Until we can really understand the truth of our own universe we are condemned to live our lives in a horror of not knowing.

And visually I was able to do a lot of things in that I wasn't able to do before. I had this wonderful cinematographer, Jerry Sheridan, an he enabled me to get the look I wanted.

Kate- How so? Jay Lind- Well, before we started shooting I did this photo layout with Lauren and, just to see if it would work, I lit some of the shots solely by candle light I'm not sure if you've seen candle light on skin, I'm sure you have, butman, when I saw what she looked like, what the camera could do, I said there was no way we wouldn't shoot using natural light ie candles, Sunlight, Moonlight, Lanterns, Reflectors. Just beautiful like a Kubrick fever dream, or Rembrandt makes a horror film what and the girls in my movie are a lot hotter than the Blair Witch girl.

Kate- You've quite a reputation as a ladies man, do you want to talk about that? Jay Lind- Now that'sa subject change. This is Draculina right? Kate- Yeah Jay Lind- Good, I thought someone konked me on the head and we were finishing this for Swank. Kate- No, really, about your reputation, that's all a lot of your fans know about you. Jay Lind- One, I don't have many fans, Two, at least they know something about me, and the whole ladies man thing, and there are worse things to be, has been exaggerated enormously!

Kate- Jay, you were married to a Penthouse Pet, Uma Thurman's Body Double and one of the most beautiful B-Movie Actresses ever. You had an affair with X-Rated star Jennifer Worthington. Jay Lind- I think that Jennifer would be surprised to find that out. We're just friends, never were anything more than that. She's beautiful and talented, and she was great in Night of The Cat but beyond that we were just friends. As for the Penthouse Pet, we were never married, and the body double and B-Movie star are the same person. As I said, the Ladies Man thing was greatly exaggerated.

Kate- What about your relationship with Maria Pechukas? Jay Lind- Well, I love her. We were married. Now we're not. We still love each other, if that what you want to know, but we can't be in the same room together or talk to each other It's all very weird. Maria is one of the most talented Actresses I've ever seen and I wish her only the best.

Kate- Anything you want to say to the aspiring filmmakers out there? Jay Lind- Yes. Give up. You don't stand a chance. No, really. If you want to make a movie, do it. Don'tlet anyone tell you that you can't, because they're probably right. But what if they aren't and you never try?

Kate- Anything else? Jay Lind- Just that I hope you like my movie. Fans have been talking about a lost Debbie Rochon and Maria Pechukas vehicle, written and directed by Jay Lind. There were articles about the movie, notably in "Femme Fatales" Vol 1 issue 3, and in various French publications. But no matter how hard one looked the film was nowhere to be seen. That is, until today. DO YOU LIKE WOMEN? is finally available from Draculina Cine, and the story of it's making, it's disappearance and it's eventual discovery is a fascinating part of B-movie history. It all started in 1991... Writer/director Jay Lind had just sold SANGRE SONGES (American title BLOOD DREAMS) for European release.

It was a short vampire fantasy starring Maria Pechukas, Debbie Rochonand Amy Lynn, which he hoped to use to raise funds to lens his erotic horror screenplay VALERIE. (At the time of this writing VALERIE is finally in production in the New York area). Jay sent the five minute promo to "Fangoria's" editor Tony Timpone, who for warded it to "Femme Fatales" editor Bill George. George immediately called Lind. He was knocked out by the style of the short and the beauty of the women, mostly nude, who acted in it. George promised Lind ample cover age in his newly found magazine. In the meantime, he asked Jay to take some pictures of Debbie Rochon for him.

Jay obliged, Debbie is beautiful, easy to photograph and she looks good naked. It was at this time that Bill George came up with his master plan...

Bill called Jay and asked him to shoot some stills of Debbie "recreating" scenes from the classic thriller AIMEZ VOUS LES FEMMES, but to do them in a "lighthearted manner." Jay figured, "What the hell? National magazine coverage and all," and set out to produce the shots. Part One of Bill's plan snapped into place and he published one of the AIMEZ VOUS shots, the rest of them mysteriously disappeared but were probably made good use of.

Along with the photo, "Femme Fatales" announced the production of are make of AIMEZ-VOUS LES FEMMES, and a short blurb regarding VALERIE. It was now assumed that Jay Lind was shooting a remake of AIMEZ-VOUSLES FEMMES, even though Lind was hip deep in fund-raising for his pet project VALERIE. One phone call changed all of that.

In late spring 1992, Bill George called Jay Lind at his home in Southampton and offered him several feature magazine articles about the production and release of VALERIE. The price? Jay first had to write and direct DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?, a feature remake of AIMEZ VOUS LES FEMMES to star Debbie nude, who acted in it. George promised Lind ample cover age in his newly found magazine. In the meantime, he asked Jay to take some pictures of Debbie Rochon for him.

Jay obliged, Debbiei s beautiful, easy to photograph and she looks good naked. It was at this time that Bill George came up with his master plan... Bill called Jay and asked him to shoot some stills of Debbie "recreating" scenes from the classic Roman Polanski thriller AIMEZ VOUS LES FEMMES, but to do them in a "lighthearted manner." Jay figured, "What the hell? National magazine coverage and all," and set out to produce the shots.

Part One of Bill's plan snapped into place and he published one of the AIMEZ VOUS shots, the rest of them mysteriously disappeared but were probably made good use of. Along with the photo, "Femme Fatales" announced the production of a remake of AIMEZ-VOUS LES FEMMES, and a short blurb regarding VALERIE. It was now assumed that Jay Lind was shooting a remake of AIMEZ-VOUS LES FEMMES, even though Lind was hip deep in fund-raising for his pet project VALERIE. One phone call changed all of that.

In late spring 1992, Bill George called Jay Lind at his home in Southampton and offered him several feature magazine articles about the production and release of VALERIE. The price? Jay first had to write and direct DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?, a feature remake of AIMEZ VOUS LES FEMMES to star Debbie Rochon. Jay flat out refused to do a remake. After a couple hours of cajoling, along with George's promise to cover VALERIE with the same fervor he covered a "Hollywood" feature, he was able to convince Jay to shoot the movie.

Jay set out to write the script, intentionally avoiding viewing the original. Wanting to use the upcoming summer season as a beach backdrop for the movie, Lind realized he only had a few weeks to write, cast and do pre-production on the project so he enlisted a childhood friend, L.A.-based writer/director/actor John Wright to help. Via e-mail, faxes and late night phone calls they were able to knock out a shooting script in two weeks. John Wright's contribution to the screenplay cannot be overstated. He provided many of the jokes and situations, and while the idea of doing it as a dark sex comedy about female cannibals was Lind's, it was ultimately his co-writer John Wright who gave the script its final polish.

DO YOU LIKE WOMEN? started shooting in June of 1992 and was scheduledfor a six week shoot. Unfortunately mother nature had other ideas and the crew found themselves shooting a summer-beach-sex comedy during the rainiest summer in the recorded history of Long Island. The cast, which included tough guy Jimmy Noonan, male lead Gregory Peirotte and the delicious Alysson Woodward (whose gorgeous body was featured through out the movie) plugged on and filming finally wrapped in September of that year. Then things started to get weird. While Jay was editing the finished product, the long awaited "Femme Fatales" article came out. Jay was not amused. To the production style/diary style article Debbie Rochon had written, editor George had tacked a prologue. In the prologue he stated that the producers had decided against making VALERIE because of the glut of vampire movies had made it impossible for that film to make a profit.

Jay was livid and immediately called Bill demanding an explanation anda retraction. Didn't Bill know how hard it was to raise capital without some bozo in a national fan magazine stating how they don't think the movie will make a retraction (a heavily edited letter was printed in the next issue) and went on to say that he would make sure that VALERIE never got made, and even if it did, no magazine would promote it. George claimed to have the power to stop Jay from working on any future projects, unless... Jay waited for the other shoe to drop, unless?

Bill was adamant, unless the title character of VALERIE was played by Debbie Rochon, he would make sure that Jay Lind never made another genre movie. Jay hung up (after calling Bill George all the suitable expletives),and considered whether or not he should drive to Baltimore, ring the bell at Bill George's mothers house, and beat him within an inch of his life.

He decided not to, it was just too long of a drive. He could give therole to Debbie and be assured a ton of coverage since it was obvious that,through no fault of hers, Bill George was obsessed with her.

Debbie was an excellent actress, and more than lovely enough to play the part. But Lind had made his choices as far as casting and while he accepted he would have these arguments with investors and producers over and over again with every film, he was not going to let some creepy toupee-wearing genre magazine editor cast his movies according to whim. Jay shut down the editing deck, turned out the lights and left with the unfinished rough cut of DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?.

The rough cut and dailies have been in his attic ever since. So, what happened to the completed movie? A battle between director Lind and producer Jon Faber of Paradise Productions over payment for the rights to the script came to head shortly after the fateful conversation with Bill George. Mr. Faber felt that Lind should go along with Bill George in order to secure publicity. Jay felt that no one had the right to tell him how tocast or edit HIS film. Faber responded by stealing the edited master of DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?.

In order to release it on video Lind pointed out that since he had never been paid he had neglected to sign the copyright of the film over to Paradise Productions and after consulting an entertainment lawyer was assured that he owned the movie. As long as the two sides were at loggerheads nobody was going to see the movie. After a couple years of this, Lind began hearing distressing reports from friends in Europe to the effect that bootleg copies of DO YOU LIKE WOMEN? were available over there.

Again consulting an entertainment lawyer Lind found out that in order to sue for copyright infringement overseas he would have to file in thecountry in question. Unwilling to spend an indefinite amount of time in various European capitals Lind decided that there wasn't much he could do about the European bootlegs, but since there was a great amount of interest in the movie he could release a version of it in the United States. The copyright was in his name and he did own the movie, so he struck a deal with Draculina Cine to get DO YOU LIKE WOMEN? out to the fans. Jay dug out the work print and finished what he started.The finished product contains a running time code at the bottom of the screen, no musical score, but good picture quality and an opportunity for fans to see a complete version of a movie that was started some eight years ago.

With the release of DO YOU LIKE WOMEN? an important chapter in Lind'scareer - as well as the careers of Debbie Rochon, Maria Pechukas and Alysson Woodward - is finally available for all to view. And the view is fine,the women lovely, the jokes work and the timing is flawless. Oh, and the nudity. Can't have a dark sex farce without the gratuitious nudity. It has been beaten around, kicked around, locked away and resurrected. For those of you that have asked the question, "Whatever happened to DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?" All we can say is, see for yourself...

NIGHT OF THE CAT
DRACULINA CINE

Jennifer Worthington,
Colleen Van Ryn

Written and Directed by Jay Lind
Produced by Jay Lind
Donald Kuss

WAKING NIGHTMARE MOVIES

Young Felicity has a problem. It seems that every full moon Felicity changes from a sweet young thing to a vicious She-Cat Killer, and this time her prey is her roommate, leggy and toothsome Heather. But Heather has a few cat tricks of her own and before you can say,"I thought I saw a Puddy-Tat!" we're up to our neck in thrills. With apologies to Lon Jr. and Co. "Even a girl who is pure at heart and says her prayersat night..."

Before she became one the hottest rising young stars of American cinema Jennifer Worthington had worked, as dancer and actresses trying tobreak into the B-movie scene. I was fortunate enough, to' know her then and to be one of the first to take nude shots of her.

I was lucky enough to write and direct her first shoot' for NIGHT OF THE CAT, an erotic moody thriller Jenn and I discussed the possibility ofher auditioning for me. When the audition actually took place I knew that she wasn't quite right for the role she read for but, she was, so good that I hadto find something before someone else' discovered her talent. Let me list her many talents for you. She is relaxed in front of thecamera very beautiful and has no trouble remembering her lines while' shewalks around completely naked.

Did I mention that she was beautiful? And while shooting NIGHT OF THE CAT she never once tripped over any of the furniture. And she was naked. Now, more about her being beautiful... Starting with her face, she is just gorgeous -with big blue eyes and full pouting lips. Her blond hair falls loose around her shoulders and often covers her face like a veil. She has a child like smile. And her body! Entire volumes could he - and probably are being - written by obsessed fans about that perfect little body. Standing just 4'8"Jennifer claims to scrape the ceiling.

She could be described as "doll" but that would be misleading because there is not much that could be described as innocent about Jenn's tight body. From her perfect C-cup breasts with their thumb-sized (Always erect) nipples, to her cute tight almost-too good-to-be-true ass, she is everyman's dream come true.

As an artist, I knew I owed it to mankind to find a role to make a movie in which Jennifer Worthington could spend almost all of the film naked. Hence NIGHT OF THE CAT.

Of all things, I actuallv came up with the premise for NIGHT OF THE CAT while talking my daughter to see "Cats" on Broadway for the umpteenth time. About halfway through the second act she stood up and pointed saying,"Daddy, Kitty-cat got boobies!" And indeed she did. Suddenly a light shone from the heavens and I was struck with a revelation. Why not have Jenn play a girl who turns into a cat every full moon but,rather than conceal her under a furry cat-suit and hide her God-given talents I would paint her body to look like a cat so she could spend the entire movie naked!

It was an epiphany. After the play I hurried home and knocked out the scriptfor NIGHT OF THE CAT, called Jenn and sealed her fate for that weekend, hired an other actress to play her prey, called Al to make sure he andhis crew could get to the set and begin to work on the scene breakdown.To say things went smoothly from there on out would be a bald-faced lie. Little did I know when I awoke that Friday morning that we were about to embark on a video adventure which was fraught with all kinds of peril. I was living in Southampton at the time and my producer Don Kuss wasin Progue, and we decided to shoot the entire movie at his estate - inhis house and on the grounds with one short scene on his property on astreet in Southampton. Having driven all the way from her home in Pennsylvania, Jenn arrivedaround noon. In short order she was followed by Al Ryan and his crew from New Jersey. I have Always used Al as my D.P. because he and I think alike and he's able to get what I want on screen quickly and efficiently without havingto have every little detail meticulously explained to him.

For this shoot we employed a three man crew. In addition to Al, our camera operator was Gerard and Eddie was the sound recorder. Whenever Gerard, Eddie and I shot a scene with the actors, Al would set up the lights for the next scene. All in all, it was a very efficient way to work. Of course, this didn't factor in the two to four hours necessary to paint Jenn's body every time or the presence of Don's girlfriend (or the fact that she was nuts - but more on that in a bit) or the mysterious disappearance of the actress I had hired from New York City who vanished from the planet once she boarded the Long Island rail road.

Imagine, if you will, the surprise on my face as I waited atthe train station for hours as train after train disgorged passengers by the dozens... All of whom were not the girl I was waiting for. Image as that look turned to a mask of terror as I realized my carefully crafted shooting schedule was crumbling. I sped back to the estate as fast as my Geo Metro could carry me and hurriedly explained everything to Al and Don. We decided to chuck the schedule, shoot everything we possibly could with Jennifer by herself on that day and then try to hire another actress between shots.

As the old saying goes, "easier said than done." So thatfirst day was spent shooting Jenn at her office, Jenn walking home, Jenn undressing, Jenn watching television, Jenn taking a bath ... well, you get the idea. By nine o'clock that night we had hired Colleen Van Ryn,an old friend of mine who agreed to drive out from Connecticut the next morning. Colleen, a statuesque red-haired beauty who's directly descended from the classic artist Rembrandt, would prove to be a blast in more ways than one. (I won't go too deeply into it but she was a bit gassy; I was painting her ass and you can probably guess the rest!) We wrapped the first night at about four. It bad been a rough night made even rougher by Don's girlfriend Lori who some how got it into her head that it was okay to talk while the cam era was rolling and that it was okay for her to give direction to the talent. After hours of crying.

"Quiet on the set"' and having private little chats with her about these on going problems, I finally had to ban her from the set. This didn't exactly go ever very well since she actually lived on the set since we were shooting at Don's home. Anyway, Don was able to smooth things over with her and his principle function from that point on became keeping Lori occupied and away from the location. Eight o'clock came early the next morning. A little earlier than usual, it seemed to me, since I had spent most of the previous four hours rewriting the shooting schedule and listening to Al saw timber on the couch.

Now, don't ever let him fool you with stories about the sounds that come out of my sleeping body, Al Ryan can saw wood with the best of them. In the snoring arena he is a world class champion. What I can't figure out is why he was sleeping on my couch in the first place, having been given a not too subtle hint from Jennifer that it would be okay with her if he spent the night in her bed. At least that's how I read it (Al finally did too - about three days too late.)

Colleen arrived after breakfast at about nine with her boyfriend Craig in tow. We quickly recruited Craig into the crew and he proved to be invaluable to the completion of the movie. And, as an honest-to-God Satanist, he provided us with some much needed spiritual guidance to help us along our way. The second day's shooting went fairly well until we were almost arrested. We shot Colleen's solo stuff and I painted Jenn for the first time. It took about four hours. Four glorious hours, mind you. I love my job. Then we started the cat-girl stuff and the stalking scenes. Every time that she would smudge her makeup I had to do a touch up, so Jennifer and I be came very close friends.

You re ally have to trust the guy who's applying makeup to your ass. Like I said, that second day went pretty smoothly until our run-in with the Law. It was the middle of the night so we went out onto the streets of Southampton to shoot some stalking scenes as well as a couple of shots of Colleen outside a bar and walking down a street.

We were almost wrapped when a patrol car containing one of Southampton's finest pulled up and asked us what we were up to on his street with lights, camera, and a naked girl painted to look like a cat. Fortunately, Al bares a striking resemblance to Bob Geldorf [of the Boomtown Rats and Live Aid fame - ed.] and we were able to convince the good officer that we were doing an MTV video and that the location permit must have been misfiled. Why was she naked? Well, it was for France! Umm-hum... I'm not sure ift he cop bought it, but when he offered to provide security for the restof the shoot, I knew we were home free. Again we wrapped at four and arose at eight. This time we drank fortwo hours after the wrap and, once more, Al missed the practically overt suggestion that he might find Jenn's bed more comfortable than my couch.

Sometimes I wonder if he's really paying any attention at all. The third and final day of shooting dawned on a tired group of hungover actors and crew. Fortunately Don was, and still is, a Zen Master coffee brewer and, several pots later, fortified with a huge breakfast, we started shooting. We had a full day ahead of us: Colleen's notorious masturbation scene, applying more cat makeup, stalking scenes in the house, the climax and the first ending. Shooting in the late morning and through the after noon, we had to approximate the look of night time since the stalking scenes were supposed to take place after dark; so the windows had to be covered with blue and violet gels.

All in All it was a major bitch of a day. When you added in the Returnof Lori the Nutcase and the Case of the Continually Exploding Movie Lights, it became the shooting day from Hell. For some unknown reason while we were shooting, Lori began to take flash photos. After chasing her off the set with a broom, we set out to work anew when the movie lights began exploding at random - and during scenes! Finally, at two A.M. on Monday morning we finished the final day of shooting on NIGHT OF THE CAT.

Jenn and Colleen washed off their makeup; I made nice with Lori and we all went out on the town to celebrate the fact that Don had a lot of money and was picking up the tab. We bar-crawled for a few hours and crashed for good around five. I didn't have the heart to tell Al that Jennifer was hitting on him again - by Jay Lind with Dott Hundley (Originally Published in Draculina Magazine) Cover Page Index